Sunday, September 30, 2012

Songwriters

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
 
Songwriters are seldom paid much for the texts they write; a successful writer with several decently selling musicians or studios as customers can make a living, but for most the song writing is just a side income. Many songwriters are musicians in other respects as well. Recording studios are the most frequent customers and pay at least moderately well, while a number of well-doing music artists buy material from writers with a reputation in the trade. As with screenwriting, living close enough to the customers is important.
 
Es Sanchez

Saturday, September 29, 2012

Screenwriters

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
 
Screenwriters are the most numerous group of scriptwriters. They write scripts for movies and television, and when the movies or TV series make a hit the writers responsible can make tidy earnings as well. Getting a script accepted is as hard as getting a book manuscript published; only one in a hundred submitted scripts are accepted for production. Not to mention that many productions never make it to a screen. For getting movie scripts accepted, it is usually considered crucial to live in the vicinity of the studios in order to be able to do changes during the production; this explains why the majority of US screenwriters seem to be living in Los Angeles. Networking is very important.

Es Sanchez

Friday, September 28, 2012

Reviewers

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
Reviewers are expected to have very good knowledge of their subject. Be it books, movies, cars or computer models; the reviewer must be both informative and entertaining without -- visibly -- be repeating himself from review to review. Reviewing has nearly as many writers as the product genres have enthusiasts, so getting a regular--paying--gig can be difficult for freelancers. The pay for freelance reviewing is at best mediocre. Sometimes the pay is the product itself (unless we are talking luxury/expensive items). Critics of events manage somewhat better; their work is more profiled and can make them celebrities on a certain level. Many a website is based on free reviews provided by enthusiasts! In larger newspapers and magazines staff writers usually provide the reviews, but freelancers do get in the occasional job.

Es Sanchez

Thursday, September 27, 2012

Resume writers

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
  Resume writers are a small subgroup of business writers who specialise in helping other people present themselves; the customers are exclusively high-income business workers looking for a new job. These writers work as independent consultants or in resume-writing companies; there are a large number of those. A resume writer's job is to take the information given by the customer, interview the customer to find further information, and then reshape the result to focus on the customer's best sides and most important accomplishments. These resumes are the customer's key to be considered for very well paid and prestigious jobs, and writing them is a job for writers well-versed in the relevant business language and career coaching. The work is, like most business writing, well paid.
Es Sanchez

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Poetry writers (poets)

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
 
Poetry writers (poets) have the unenviable position of being the lowest paid writers in the entire writing business. Poetry simply doesn't sell, even if many read poetry. Many poetry writers find themselves paying to enter contests where the top prize is being published and get a complimentary copy of the magazine -- or in the worst cases, be asked to buy the resulting anthology afterwards (that only the submitting authors will be interested in buying.) A number of poetry websites and e-zines purchase the occasional poem for small sums, but poetry writing cannot be called paid work for the vast majority of the writers who indulge in it.

Es Sanchez

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

Technical writers

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
 
 Technical writers don't win much fame for their user manuals and system documentation, but in these days of incredible technical development and product turnover it is a lucrative writing business. Once a writer is engaged by a company to write documentation, he can reasonably expect further work updating old and writing new documentation for other products. This type of work requires professional level knowledge in the relevant technology and product, a methodical nature and some teaching skills. Technical writers are often employed as staff writers in bigger companies, but can easily find work as freelancers for small companies
 
Es sanchez

Play writers

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
 
Play writers are the most glamorous writers in the writing profession, but the potential for fame is greater than the potential for making an income of it. With a highly limited number of theatrical ensembles, there's a market for only so many plays per year. To get a play script accepted it is essential to live in the right place and have the right connections in the theatre business, and the number of hopeful beginning playwrights outnumbers by far the ones who get lucky. Amateur theatre companies will accept the occasional manuscript, but there's very little income in that. Radio is a market, if you can get in. There's also competitions. 

Es Sanchez

Monday, September 24, 2012

Online writers

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
 
Online writers are best described as those who do a major part of their writing for websites and e-zines. Most are freelancers, many have no previous background as writers from the paper world, and the vast majority has other day jobs. This group includes article, poetry, short story and even book writers. The pay for being published online is lower and the prestige less than for being published on paper, but the online market is vast and practically bottomless. Unfortunately, many low-class markets are based on getting work from authors for free. It is possible to make a modest living just writing for the paying online markets, but experienced and successful online writers may profitably work for the more lucrative paper market instead. For amateur writers the online world is a Godsend, as it provides them with an outlet for their work and allows them to climb upward as they progress in their skill.
 
Es Sanchez

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Novelists

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
 
Novelists, also known as authors, write long stories. Much can be said about the craft, but the prime virtue of a novelist is the ability to plan and complete the work. These days a fiction book is easily 200,000 words long for some genres; keeping track of the progress of the plot and the characters' development requires forward planning and much patience. With an annual turnout of at best two books for most fiction authors, it's a long way to the best seller lists where you have to be to make a living. Non-fiction book writers have a slightly better chance as there are many companies with projects they'll pay advance for, but you either make a living as a best-selling author or you have a second job. On the other hand, that second job can be a writing-related one!

Es Sanchez

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Saturday, September 22, 2012

Nonfiction book writers

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
 
Nonfiction book writers are a large group of writers that includes academic and technical writers as well as people with even more enthusiasm than writing skills. What they have in common is the ability to take a large chunk of information within a specialised field and turn it into a systematic and readable text that will leave the reader satisfied after reading it. Non-fiction book writing is pretty much like article writing in that it requires fact checking and research, no matter if it is a deep political analysis or an account of a historical event. Non-fiction books can be written for love, money or both; what matters is that the writer has sufficient knowledge of what he writes about. Non-fiction is usually written in co-operation with a publisher; the publisher is usually quite willing in helping to plan the book outline. As regular non-fiction book writers usually work with a few narrow fields, there's very seldom room for them as full time book writers. Most of them will work with a publisher one book at a time, just like novelists. If they also are technical writers it's quite a lot simpler to find such work.
 
Es Sanchez

Friday, September 21, 2012

Journalists

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.

 Journalists are a mixed group of writers. They are the writers read by the most people; working in the national and local newspapers and magazines that are read every day by millions of people. Working as a journalist in a newspaper or magazine staff normally requires a college degree in journalism, but there's often a place even in those staffs for people with a nose for news and the skills to communicate them effectively. The one unbreakable rule: Keep the deadlines. The problem with writing news articles is that the works normally are outdated fast and can't be resold. It can be helped somewhat by turning each news item into several articles. Many journalists are freelancers, who live by the quality of their work rather than their school papers. Full time and experienced journalists are usually able to make a living; part-timers can make a respectable side income.

Es Sanchez

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Grant writers

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
 
  Grant writers are copywriters in a class of their own. Their specialised skill is how to write applications for grants from governmental and private institutions that hand out cash for various purposes. This type of writing normally requires substantial knowledge of law and business language. Since the decision of the grantgiver is based on this application and if positive will reap a large financial result, successful grant writers tend to be paid extremely well. Many grant writers are lawyers by profession. Large institutions that base their income on grants will employ grant writers as staff writers, but there is definitely a place for freelancers in the business if they have the necessary deep knowledge of philantrophia. 
 
Es Sanchez

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Ghostwriters

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.

  Ghostwriters are an anonymous but quite large subgroup of book writers. Like speechwriters, they have specialised in writing for other people as if they were these persons. The customers are primarily business leaders and/or people with a high media profile. In order to write these books the writer must plan the book with the customer, perform a number of interviews with the same, do research on the book's topic (in order to understand it) and be able to capture some of the customer's writing style. The work is challenging, requires substantial people skills and much patience -- considerable rewrites are often necessary. Naturally, the ghostwriter is obliged not to reveal his or her work in the book. Depending on the customer's media profile, the work can be from mediocre to very well paid. This is not an easy market to break into
 
Es Sanchez

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Game Writers

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
 
Game Writers are a specialised kind of screenwriter. They write the plots, create the characters and describe the surroundings in general terms, and also write the dialogue used in the game. Unlike many other types of writing this is done in close cooperation with a team. The programmers and artists must be involved from the start to ensure that the game not only will be possible to create, but also that the mechanisms vital to any game are provided: playability, action curves, smoothness and the necessary distance from the other current games in the genre. Hardcore gamers spend a lot of money on games, but demand a lot of the games -- and of the game plots. Larger game companies have staff writers, but most of the small studios selling game prototypes to the big companies engage freelancers for this. The latter typically pays in terms of royalties, which means that if the project fails there's no pay. Writing games is fun and highly creative work, but the quickly changing demands of the project team leads to rapid and incessant rewrites. Writers can earn well, once they have a couple of successes behind them -- but the success depends on the entire team succeeding.
 
Es Sanchez

Monday, September 17, 2012

Freelance writers

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
 
  Freelance writers are by definition all those writers who do not make their living of one fulltime writing engagement. The term isn't usually used about novelists, though, even if they write for several publishers. Being a freelance writer has a lot to offer in terms of freedom; you can work when you like and as much as you like, combine your writing with parenting or take breaks for long vacations. That sort of thing tends to affect your income a lot, however. Many beginning writers will find freelancing work a lot easier to get than staff writing positions, but only veterans working full time can make a decent living from it.
 
Es Sanchez

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Erotica writers

 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.
Erotica writers usually prefer to be anonymous, but it's hard to beat the more expensive erotic magazines for payment; being paid up to a dollar per word for short stories is not to be sneered at. Writing erotica requires a suitably lurid imagination, a not too coarse language, knowing the handful of standard plots and formulaic scripts that most erotic stories follow, and a knack for not getting easily bored. Many well known writers have a past as writers of erotica, although most of them will be reluctant to admit in later and more publicly successful years. Like other storywriters they mostly work as freelancers; book writers may work with only one publisher, and even on contract with advance royalties if they are really good. The main customers, naturally, are erotic magazines.
 
Es Sanchez

Saturday, September 15, 2012

Copywriters


 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.

 Copywriters are among the best-paid writers in the whole business. All marketing is written in order to sell something and normally a good marketing text ('copy') sells more products than a mediocre text, so good copywriters get paid well. There's little public fame to find in this line of writing, but being known and respected among the professionals in this line truly comes down to cash. Copywriters' most valuable virtue is the ability to evoke interest and enthusiasm about a product while retaining the readers' trust. A dollar or more per word is quite attainable for average freelancers, and many copywriters are staff writers in marketing bureaus.

Es Sanchez

Friday, September 14, 2012

Columnists


 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.

Columnists typically make their living by following and commenting on trends rather than news. Columns are a staple item in newspapers, magazines and newsletters. The better class of columnists is syndicated, and their columns can appear in hundreds of newspapers. Writing a new article every week for the same column can be a challenge, though! In larger newspapers and magazines there often are staff journalists with an established name who provide the regular columns.

Es Sanchez

Thursday, September 13, 2012

Business writers


 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.

Business writers are those writers who work for the commercial business magazines and newspapers for high-income readers. It's like any other type of article writing except for strict demands to language skills and relevant business knowledge; the readers are cutting-edge professionals and the writers must be on roughly the same level -- or better. Business writing is done both by freelancers and staff writers, but not by amateurs. Business writing is considered well paid work, and there are many markets both on and off line.

                                                                         Es Sanchez

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Article writers


 New writers looking for a career do not always realize .just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.

 Article writers include all the non-fiction writers who do short pieces on specific themes, topics or news items. Travel writers, food writers, medical writers; these are all specialists on their topic and usually write for many magazines. Article writers can be freelancers or staff writers; what they have in common is the ability to write articles in a concise and crisp language. The market for well-written articles is vast, both on and off the Internet. Experienced and highly regarded writers with a deeply specialised knowledge (medicine, bleeding-edge technologies, international shipping, shares etc.) can make a very good living in commercial, pro-level magazines.

Es Sanchez


Tuesday, September 11, 2012

What Kind of Writer Do You Want to Be? #1

New writers looking for a career do not always realise just how many paths there are to choose within the writing field. It is easy to see the writer's role in the production of a book or a newspaper, but writers are present in practically all types of scripted activities for public viewing -- be it the evening news, the morning cartoons or political speeches. Of course, most writers find it necessary to do more than one type of writing! The art of shaping words is employed in an incredible number of job types.

Academic writers

Are all those who write for scientific journals, university magazines etc. They are basically article writers and/or book writers, but unlike most other writers they don't write for money directly. The thing about academic magazines is that being published with them is considered an honour; there's no other pay for it. The reason those writers fight to get in is that being published there furthers their academic career; indirectly those articles help them keep their jobs as teachers, professors and/or scientists. The articles and/or books published are results of years of studies within the writers' field, and can make or break careers. Aspiring writers should steer away from this type of work: Leave it to the academics. 

**Es Sanchez**


Monday, September 10, 2012

25 Things I Want To Say To So-Called “Aspiring” Writers


Seen a lot of folks giving advice to so-called “aspiring” writers these days, so, I figured what the hell? Might as well throw my dubious nuggets of wisdom into the stew. See if any of this tastes right to you.
 

2. Kick Your Lowest Common Denominator In The Kidneys

You can aspire to be a lot of other things within the writing realm, and that’s okay. You can aspire to be a published author. Or a bestselling author. Or a professional freelance writer. Or an author who plagiarizes his memoir and gets struck with a wooden mallet wielded by Oprah live on primetime television. You should aspire to be a better writer. We all should. Nobody is at the top of his game. We can all climb higher.


 Seen a lot of folks giving advice to so-called “aspiring” writers these days, so, I figured what the hell? Might as well throw my dubious nuggets of wisdom into the stew. See if any of this tastes right to you.


No More Aspiring, Dingbats

Here are the two states in which you may exist: person who writes, or person who does not. If you write: you are a writer. If you do not write: you are not. Aspiring is a meaningless null state that romanticizes Not Writing. It’s as ludicrous as saying, “I aspire to pick up that piece of paper that fell on the floor.” Either pick it up or don’t. I don’t want to hear about how your diaper’s full. Take it off or stop talking about it.

2. Kick Your Lowest Common Denominator In The Kidneys

You can aspire to be a lot of other things within the writing realm, and that’s okay. You can aspire to be a published author. Or a bestselling author. Or a professional freelance writer. Or an author who plagiarizes his memoir and gets struck with a wooden mallet wielded by Oprah live on primetime television. You should aspire to be a better writer. We all should. Nobody is at the top of his game. We can all climb higher.

3. Aspiring Writers, Far As The Eye Can See

Nobody respects writers, yet everybody wants to be one (probably because everybody wants to be one). Point is, you want to be a writer? Good for you. So does that guy. And that girl. And him. And her. And that old dude. And that young broad. And your neighbor. And your mailman. And that chihuahua. And that copy machine. Ahead of you is an ocean of wannabe ink-slaves and word-earners. I don’t say this to daunt you. Or to be dismissive. But you have to differentiate yourself and the way you do that is by doing rather than be pretending. You will climb higher than them on a ladder built from your wordsmithy.

4. We All Booby-Trap The Jungle Behind Us

There exists no one way toward becoming a professional writer. You cannot perfectly walk another’s journey. That’s why writing advice is just that — it’s advice. It’s mere suggestion. Might work. Might not. Lots of good ideas out there, but none of it is gospel. One person will tell you this is the path. Another will point the other way and say that is the path. They’re both right for themselves, and they’re both probably wrong for you. We all chart our own course and burn the map afterward. It’s just how it is. If you want to find the way forward, then stop looking for maps and start walking.

5. The Golden Perfect Path Of The Scrivening Bodhisattvas

Point is, fuck the One True Way. Doesn’t exist. Nobody has answers — all you get are suggestions. Anybody who tells you they have The Answer is gassy with lies. Distrust such certainty and play the role of skeptic.

6. Yes, It Always Feels This Way

You will always have days when you feel like an amateur. When it feels like everybody else is better than you. You will have this nagging suspicion that someone will eventually find you out, call you on your bullshit, realize you’re the literary equivalent of a vagrant painting on the side of a wall with a piece of calcified poop. You will have days when the blank page is like being lost in a blizzard. You will sometimes hate what you wrote today, or yesterday, or ten years ago. Bad days are part of the package. You just have to shut them out, swaddle your head in tinfoil, and keep writing anyway.

7. Figure Out How You Write, Then Do That

You learn early on how to write. But for most authors it takes a long time to learn how they in particular write. Certain processes, styles, genres, character types, POVs, tenses, whatever — they will come more naturally to you than they do to others. And some won’t come naturally at all. Maybe you’ll figure this out right out of the gate. But for most, it just takes time — time filled with actual writing — to tease it out.

8. Finish Your Shit

I’m just going to type this out a dozen times so it’s clear: finish your shit. Finish your shit. Finish your shit. Finish your shit. Finish your shit. Finish your shit! FINISH YOUR SHIT. Finish. Your. Shit. Fiiiiniiiish yooooour shiiiiit. COMPLETO EL POOPO. Vervollständigen Sie Ihre Fäkalien! Finish your shit.

9. You Need To Learn The Rules. . .

…in order to know when they must be broken.

10. You Need To Break The Rules. . .

… in order to know why they matter.

11. What I Mean By Rules Is–

Writing is a technical skill. A craft. You can argue that storytelling is an art. You can argue that art emerges from good writing the way a dolphin riding a jet-ski emerges the longer you stare at a Magic Eye painting. But don’t get ahead of yourself, hoss. You still need to know how to communicate. You need to learn the laws of this maddening land. I’ve seen too many authors want to jump ahead of the skill and just start telling stories — you ever try to get ahead of your own skill level? I used to imagine pictures in my head and I’d try to paint them in watercolor and they’d end up looking like someone barfed up watery yogurt onto the canvas. I’d rail against this: WHY DON’T THEY LOOK BEAUTIFUL? Uhh, because you don’t know how to actually paint, dumb-fuck. You cannot exert your talent unless you first have the skill to bolster that talent.

12. Oh, The Salad Days Of College!

Why are the days of our youth known as “salad days?” Is “salad” really the image that conjures up the wild and fruitful times of our adolescence? “Fritos,” maybe. Or “Beer keg.” I dunno. What were we talking about? Ah! Yes. College. Do you need it? Do you need a collegiate education, Young Aspirant to the Penmonkey Order? Need, no. To get published nobody gives a flying rat penis whether or not you have a degree. They just care that you can write. Now, college and even post-grad work may help you become a better writer — it did for me! — though, I’d argue that the money you throw into the tank getting there may have been better spent on feeding yourself while you just learn how to write in whatever mousetrap you call a domicile. You can only learn so much from someone teaching you how to write. Eventually you just have to write.

13. Reading Does Not Make You A Writer

That’s the old piece of advice, isn’t it? “All you need to do is read and write to be a writer.” You don’t learn to write through reading anymore than you learn carpentry by sitting on a chair. You learn to write by writing. And, when you do read something, you learn from it by dissecting it — what is the author doing? How are characters and plot drawn together? You must read critically — that is the key.

14. Here Is Your Tin Cup, Your Hobo Bindle, Your Rat-Nest Undies

You’re going to starve for a while, so just get used to that now. Don’t quit your day job. Yet.

15. Commerce Is Not The Enemy Of Art

If you think commerce somehow devalues art, then we’re done talking. I got nothin’ for you. Money doesn’t devalue art any more than art devalues money — commerce can help art, hurt art, or have no effect. The saying isn’t Money is the root of all evil. It’s The love of money is the root of all evil. Commerce only damages art when the purpose of the art is only money. So it is with your writing.

16. Overnight Success Probably Isn’t

Suddenly on your radar screen is a big giant glowing mass like you’d see when a swarm of xenomorphs is closing fast on your position and it’s like, “Hey! This author appeared out of nowhere! Overnight success! Mega-bestseller! Million-dollar deal!” And then you get it in your head: “I can do that, too. I can go from a relative nobody to America’s Favorite Author, and Oprah will keep me in a gilded cage and she’ll feed me rare coffees whose beans were first run through the intestinal tract of a dodo bird.” Yeah, except, those who are “overnight successes,” rarely appear out of nowhere. It’s the same way that an asteroid doesn’t “just appear” before destroying earth and plunging it into a dust-choked dead-sun apocalypse: that fucker took a long time to reach earth, even if we didn’t notice. Overnight successes didn’t win the lottery. They likely toiled away in obscurity for years. The lesson is: work matters.

17. Meet The Universe In The Middle

My theory in life and writing is this — and it’s some deeply profound shit, so here, lower the lights, put on a serious turtleneck with a houndstooth elbow-patched jacket over it, and go ahead and smoke this weird hash I stole from an Afghani cult leader. The theory is this: meet the universe halfway and the universe will meet you in return. Explained more completely: there exist components of any career (but writing in particular) that are well beyond your grasp. You cannot control everything. Some of it is just left to fate. But, you still have to put in the work. You won’t get struck by lightning if you don’t run out the storm. You must maximize your chances. You do this by meeting the universe halfway. You do this by working.

18. Self-Publishing Is Not The Easy Way Out

Self-publishing is a viable path. It is not, however, the easy path. Get shut of this notion. You don’t just do a little ballerina twirl and a book falls out of your vagina. (And if that does happen, please see a doctor. Especially if you’re a dude.) It takes a lot of effort to bring a proper self-published book to life. Divest yourself of the idea that it’s the cheaper, easier, also-ran path. Faster, yes. But that’s all.

19. No, Total Stranger, I Don’t Want To Read Your Stuff

I really don’t. And neither does any other working author. It’s nothing personal. We just don’t know you from any other spam-bot lurking in the wings ready to dump a bucket of dick pills and Nigerian money over our heads. That’s not to say we won’t be friendly or are unwilling to talk to you about your work, but we’re already probably neck deep in the ordure of our own wordsmithy. (Or we’re drunk and confused at a Chuck-E-Cheese somewhere.) We cannot take the time to read the work of total strangers. Be polite if you’re going to ask. And damn sure don’t get mad when we say no.

20. Your Jealousy And Depression Do Not Matter

All writers get down on themselves. It’s in our wheelhouse. We see other writers being successful and at first we’re all like, “Yay, good for that person!” but then ten minutes later we get this sniper’s bullet of envy and this poison feeling shoots through the center of our brain like a railroad spike: BUT WHY NOT ME? And then we go take a bath with a toaster. Fuck that. Those feelings don’t matter. They don’t help you. They may be normal, they may be natural, but they’re not useful and they’re certainly not interesting.

21. Talking About Writing Is Not The Same As Writing

Needs no further comment.

22. Pack Your Echo Chamber With C4 And Blow It Skyward

Aspiring writers lock themselves away in echo chambers filled with other aspiring writers where one of two things often happen: one, everybody gives each other happy handjobs and nobody writes anything bad and everybody likes everything and it’s a big old self-congratulatory testicle-tickling festival; two, it’s loaded for bear by people who don’t know how to give good criticism and the criticism is destructive rather than constructive and it’s just a cloud of bad vibes swirling around your head like a plague of urinating bats. If you find yourself in this kind of echo chamber, blow a hole in the wall and crawl to freedom.

23. Learn To Take A Punch

Agents, editors, reviewers, readers, trolls on the Internet, they’re going to say things you don’t want to hear. A thick skin isn’t enough. You need a leathery carapace. A chitinous exoskeleton. Writing is a hard-knock career where you invite a bevy of slings and arrows into your face and heart. It is what it is.

24. You Can Do Whatever The Fuck You Want

As a writer, the world you create is yours and yours alone. Someone will always be there to tell you what you can’t do, but they’re nearly always wrong. You’re a writer. You can make anything up that you want. It may not be lucrative. It may not pay your mortgage. But we’re not talking about that. We’re talking about what’s going on between you and the blank page before you. It’s just you and the story. If you love it and you want to write it, then wire your trap shut and write it. And write it well. Expect nothing beyond this — expect no reward, expect no victory parade — but embrace the satisfaction it gives you to do your thing.

25. The One No-Fooling Rule

Is “write.” Write, write, write, motherfucking write. Write better today than you did yesterday and better tomorrow than you did today. Onward, fair penmonkey, onward. If you’re not a writer, something will stop you — your own doubts, hate from haters, a bad review, poor time management, a hungry raccoon that nibbles off your fingers, whatever. If you’re a writer, you’ll write. And you’ll never stop to look back.

ES SANCHEZ
 

Sunday, September 9, 2012

ASPIRING WRITER: Twenty Five


25 Things I Want To Say To So-Called “Aspiring” Writers
 
 
Seen a lot of folks giving advice to so-called “aspiring” writers these days, so, I figured what the hell? Might as well throw my dubious nuggets of wisdom into the stew. See if any of this tastes right to you.
 
25th

The One No-Fooling Rule

Is “write.” Write, write, write, motherfucking write. Write better today than you did yesterday and better tomorrow than you did today. Onward, fair penmonkey, onward. If you’re not a writer, something will stop you — your own doubts, hate from haters, a bad review, poor time management, a hungry raccoon that nibbles off your fingers, whatever. If you’re a writer, you’ll write. And you’ll never stop to look back.

Es Sanchez

Saturday, September 8, 2012

ASPIRING WRITER: Twenty Four


25 Things I Want To Say To So-Called “Aspiring” Writers
 
 
Seen a lot of folks giving advice to so-called “aspiring” writers these days, so, I figured what the hell? Might as well throw my dubious nuggets of wisdom into the stew. See if any of this tastes right to you.
 
24th

You Can Do Whatever The Fuck You Want

As a writer, the world you create is yours and yours alone. Someone will always be there to tell you what you can’t do, but they’re nearly always wrong. You’re a writer. You can make anything up that you want. It may not be lucrative. It may not pay your mortgage. But we’re not talking about that. We’re talking about what’s going on between you and the blank page before you. It’s just you and the story. If you love it and you want to write it, then wire your trap shut and write it. And write it well. Expect nothing beyond this — expect no reward, expect no victory parade — but embrace the satisfaction it gives you to do your thing.

Es Sanchez

Friday, September 7, 2012

ASPIRING WRITER: Twenty Three


25 Things I Want To Say To So-Called “Aspiring” Writers
 
 
Seen a lot of folks giving advice to so-called “aspiring” writers these days, so, I figured what the hell? Might as well throw my dubious nuggets of wisdom into the stew. See if any of this tastes right to you.
 
23rd

Learn To Take A Punch

Agents, editors, reviewers, readers, trolls on the Internet, they’re going to say things you don’t want to hear. A thick skin isn’t enough. You need a leathery carapace. A chitinous exoskeleton. Writing is a hard-knock career where you invite a bevy of slings and arrows into your face and heart. It is what it is.

Es Sanchez

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

ASPIRING WRITER: Twenty One


25 Things I Want To Say To So-Called “Aspiring” Writers
 
 
Seen a lot of folks giving advice to so-called “aspiring” writers these days, so, I figured what the hell? Might as well throw my dubious nuggets of wisdom into the stew. See if any of this tastes right to you.
 
21th

Talking About Writing Is Not The Same As Writing

Needs no further comment.

Es Sanchez

Tuesday, September 4, 2012

ASPIRING WRITER: Twenty


25 Things I Want To Say To So-Called “Aspiring” Writers
Seen a lot of folks giving advice to so-called “aspiring” writers these days, so, I figured what the hell? Might as well throw my dubious nuggets of wisdom into the stew. See if any of this tastes right to you.
20th

Your Jealousy And Depression Do Not Matter

All writers get down on themselves. It’s in our wheelhouse. We see other writers being successful and at first we’re all like, “Yay, good for that person!” but then ten minutes later we get this sniper’s bullet of envy and this poison feeling shoots through the center of our brain like a railroad spike: BUT WHY NOT ME? And then we go take a bath with a toaster. Fuck that. Those feelings don’t matter. They don’t help you. They may be normal, they may be natural, but they’re not useful and they’re certainly not interesting.

Es Sanchez

Monday, September 3, 2012

ASPIRING WRITER: Nineteen


25 Things I Want To Say To So-Called “Aspiring” Writers
Seen a lot of folks giving advice to so-called “aspiring” writers these days, so, I figured what the hell? Might as well throw my dubious nuggets of wisdom into the stew. See if any of this tastes right to you.
19th

No, Total Stranger, I Don’t Want To Read Your Stuff

I really don’t. And neither does any other working author. It’s nothing personal. We just don’t know you from any other spam-bot lurking in the wings ready to dump a bucket of dick pills and Nigerian money over our heads. That’s not to say we won’t be friendly or are unwilling to talk to you about your work, but we’re already probably neck deep in the ordure of our own wordsmithy. (Or we’re drunk and confused at a Chuck-E-Cheese somewhere.) We cannot take the time to read the work of total strangers. Be polite if you’re going to ask. And damn sure don’t get mad when we say no.

Es Sanchez

Sunday, September 2, 2012

ASPIRING WRITER: Eighteen


25 Things I Want To Say To So-Called “Aspiring” Writers
Seen a lot of folks giving advice to so-called “aspiring” writers these days, so, I figured what the hell? Might as well throw my dubious nuggets of wisdom into the stew. See if any of this tastes right to you.
18th

Self-Publishing Is Not The Easy Way Out

Self-publishing is a viable path. It is not, however, the easy path. Get shut of this notion. You don’t just do a little ballerina twirl and a book falls out of your vagina. (And if that does happen, please see a doctor. Especially if you’re a dude.) It takes a lot of effort to bring a proper self-published book to life. Divest yourself of the idea that it’s the cheaper, easier, also-ran path. Faster, yes. But that’s all. 

Es Sanchez

Saturday, September 1, 2012

ASPIRING WRITER: Seventeen


25 Things I Want To Say To So-Called “Aspiring” Writers
 
 
Seen a lot of folks giving advice to so-called “aspiring” writers these days, so, I figured what the hell? Might as well throw my dubious nuggets of wisdom into the stew. See if any of this tastes right to you.
 
17th

Meet The Universe In The Middle

My theory in life and writing is this — and it’s some deeply profound shit, so here, lower the lights, put on a serious turtleneck with a houndstooth elbow-patched jacket over it, and go ahead and smoke this weird hash I stole from an Afghani cult leader. The theory is this: meet the universe halfway and the universe will meet you in return. Explained more completely: there exist components of any career (but writing in particular) that are well beyond your grasp. You cannot control everything. Some of it is just left to fate. But, you still have to put in the work. You won’t get struck by lightning if you don’t run out the storm. You must maximize your chances. You do this by meeting the universe halfway. You do this by working.

Es Sanchez

ASPIRING WRITER: Sixteen

                                       


25 Things I Want To Say To So-Called “Aspiring” Writers
Seen a lot of folks giving advice to so-called “aspiring” writers these days, so, I figured what the hell? Might as well throw my dubious nuggets of wisdom into the stew. See if any of this tastes right to you.
16th

                                          Overnight Success Probably Isn’t

Suddenly on your radar screen is a big giant glowing mass like you’d see when a swarm of xenomorphs is closing fast on your position and it’s like, “Hey! This author appeared out of nowhere! Overnight success! Mega-bestseller! Million-dollar deal!” And then you get it in your head: “I can do that, too. I can go from a relative nobody to America’s Favorite Author, and Oprah will keep me in a gilded cage and she’ll feed me rare coffees whose beans were first run through the intestinal tract of a dodo bird.” Yeah, except, those who are “overnight successes,” rarely appear out of nowhere. It’s the same way that an asteroid doesn’t “just appear” before destroying earth and plunging it into a dust-choked dead-sun apocalypse: that fucker took a long time to reach earth, even if we didn’t notice. Overnight successes didn’t win the lottery. They likely toiled away in obscurity for years. The lesson is: work matters.

Es Sanchez